The Hunt for Burr’s Lost Marbles

This was originally posted on my blogger page. But since I will be deleting that blog, I wanted to save this one.

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My father has always been very difficult to buy gifts for. Sometimes, I think he doesn't care what we get him, but the creativity and thought that go into the gift are more important to him. Never the less, sometimes it is difficult to keep our gifts away from Daddy, because he peeks, he cheats and he spies. So this year, my sisters and I decided if that is what he wants, then that is what he is going to get!

Our father taught us at an early age to be creative. And as we grew, he encouraged our creativity. This is all his fault. It is his fault, because he taught us to be creative. Now, we are using this gift of creativity against him.

For Father's Day, my dad had to become a spy. He had to follow clues, meet with fellow agents, and meet deadlines to achieve his secret mission set upon him by mission control.

I am no Tom Clancy. My dad is clearly no James Bond. But, this is our spy story. So sit back and enjoy. We now present "The Hunt For Burr's Lost Marbles"

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Internal Memo

To: Secret Agent Spy Story Reader

From: Mission Control

Re: The Hunt For Burr's Lost Marbles

Date: 06/20/10

We want you to be familiar with all agents associated with "The Hunt For Burr's Lost Marbles"

Secret Agent Name Civilian Name Relation

1.I've Lost My Marbles Burr Mathews Patriarch, and head spy

2.Wreck Rebekah Mathews Burr's oldest daughter

3.Dr Dork Rachel Mathews Burr's middle daughter

4.FreakFace Brinkley Mathews Burr's youngest daughter

5.Clover Elaine Mathews Burr's wife and best friend

6.Peppermint Pat Binkley Burr's Choir Buddy

7.99 Robert Fowler Burr's Co-Fish Camper

8.Man of Many Voices Danny Atchley Burr's Co-Fish Camper/Choir Go-er

9.Banjo Paul Hart Burr's Co-Fish Camper

10.Them are some big ole guns Chet Beck Burr's awesome neighbor

11.Wavy Fingers Matt Plunk Burr's Choir Director

12.8 point Gary Keyt Burr's Friend and awesome guy

 

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Date: 25APR2010

Time: 1900 hours

Place: Mission Control

Our story begins on a beautiful spring day. Butterflies ride the lazy breeze; bees sip lazily on the nectar of spring's first bloom; and neighbors congregate on their porch fronts with sweet iced tea in hand. It seemed to be the perfect end to a perfect day in the small haven of Springfield. Downstairs an old man sits in his rocking chair reminiscing about "the old days," the smoke of his cigarette dancing gracefully, reflecting the peace and tranquility of his story. The young adults sit on the porch and steps, cold brews slightly sweating in their hands as they listen in an almost trance-like state to the old man. No one downstairs knew that their neighbor upstairs, the one they deemed "the pizza chick," was in distress. They knew nothing about her, and that was how she liked it. They would never guess that upstairs was not a simple apartment, it was mission control. Their thoughts were never imaginative or conspiratorial enough to guess that the small apartment upstairs was anything but what it seemed. They could not look deep enough past the exterior door to discover that is was mission control for the group only known as M.E. And at this very moment Secret Agent Wreck was on a very important conference call with Secret Agent Dr. Dork over at the staging area.

"He must be stopped," lamented Agent Wreck.

"That he must! All of our careful planning is ruined if he intercepts even one little clue! He is no Aloysius X.L. Pendergast, but he is one smart cookie," Agent Dr. Dork replied.

"Smart cookie!? He is a facinorous-fiend! One little slip up by mission control's shipping agent, UPS, and within twenty minutes all details were uncovered. And by that time the mission could not be aborted. The final drop off was mere days away. All of mission control's countless nights and endless planning thwarted, and by who? Douglas Burr Mathews! Who is that!? He is no one in the international scheme of things. I mean come on, he's just a field engineer for goodness sake!"

"Let's give him a little credit. He is the Senior field engineer."

"Yeah, senior. You know what that means? He's old."

At this Dr. Dork chortled and continued, "He's not old, he is perceptive and experienced."

"Ok, whatever," Wreck rolled her eyes. "That still does not mean he has to demolish all of our plans! Who does he think he is? James Bond!?"

"Now, wait a minute, you may have an idea there."

"Well I'm full of ideas, but which one?"

"Instead of working against him, why not work with him?"

"Um, because GE Medical wouldn't hire me."

"You're joking right?" Dr Dork looked worried.

"Of course I am! I see what you're saying. Instead of mission control trying to act against these dastardly deeds, why not have mission control actually control his moves and the clues he does get?"

"Agent Wreck, you are an evil genius! Perfectly put, we control what clues he gets." The thought of a counter-terrorism attempt brought a sparkle to Dr. Dork's eyes.

"Let us think more on this, and conference again in two days time to iron out details. Same time, same place?"

"I must agree. I need to sleep, my 'civilian job' requires the utmost attention."

"Haha, yes indeed. Well guten nacht. Agent Wreck over and out."

"Agent Dr. Dork over and out," and with that the undercover conference was over, and a mission, like never attempted before in the simple town of Springfield, had begun.

Wreck looked around mission control, shut down her encrypted link, and went downstairs to make an appearance as "the pizza chick", on a normal night, hanging out on the front porch with her neighbors. No one would know what had transpired upstairs. Not yet at least.

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01MAY2010 2100HRS

As the rain continued to fall, Wreck waited impatiently at mission control. Dr. Dork was supposed to have connected to their secure link at 2000HRS. In one short week many ideas had been tossed around; some were good, some were bad, and some were downright ugly. Agent Wreck flipped through channels on the TV while keeping an eye on her secure link panel. Just as she decided to watch Tomorrow Never Dies, there was a notice that a connection had been made on the secure link. Wreck rushed to the computer, "Agent Dr. Dork! You're late! Please do not tell me you forgot about our scheduled conference. There is much to tell you and there is not a lot of time before the satellite is out of range and our link is broken!"

"Ok, Agent Wreck, I won't tell you I forgot so we don't waste time with a lecture." Dr. Dork continued, "Fill me in on the progress."

"The mission has been approved as code name 'The Hunt For Burr's Lost Marbles.' Secret Agent Peppermint and Secret Agent 99 have signed on."

Agent Wreck checked the screen as a notice popped up that an unauthorized user had tried to connect to the secure link. "Stupid civilians! They think they can crack our encrypted connection. Anyways, Secret Agent FreakFace has been given confidential access to the mission and been briefed on all the details. Her package will be delivered to the drop spot by 12JUN2010."

"The drop spot has been secured. What about Secret Agents Clover, Man of Many Voices, Banjo, and Them Are Some Big Ole Guns, have they confirmed?" Dr. Dork reviewed the checklist to ensure they were on the same page.

"Agent Clover has confirmed and will be monitoring I've Lost My Marbles' progress. She will also be assisting when necessary. Mission control is still waiting on confirmation from the other agents."

"Good. Do you think we should bring in two more agents for good measure? That will surely keep I've Lost My Marbles on his toes."

"I had thought of that. Do you think we can trust Agent Wavy Finger and Agent 8 Point?"

"I had thought about them. Their background checks have cleared and both passed the M.E. agent review. Interestingly enough, they have been ranked superb for 'secrecy in top missions.' I see no reason not to trust them," Dr. Dork remarked as she pulled up a web window to browse on anthropologie.com.

"Ok, I will make contact and secure cooperation."

"Ooh, cute comforter," exclaimed Dr Dork.

"Agent, don't let yourself get distracted! This is a very important mission and you are looking at comforters!"

"Well you seem to have everything under control. Keep me updated. I think we are losing the signal. Keep up the good work. Agent Dr. Dork over and out."

"Are we losing our signal or do you want to shop? Agent Wreck over and out."

"Both! Over and out." Dr. Dork looked guiltily at the comforter and decided to wait until another day.

Wreck shut down the secure link and looked at the growing mound of paperwork surrounding mission control. Comforters! Agent Dr. Dork was easily distracted, but her high intelligence and trustworthiness made her a great asset and ally. Wreck glanced at the screen briefly to watch James Bond, and then looked back at her computer. She already had two sets of mission briefing documents to type up, and there would be up to seven more. If she didn't get started, the mission would be delayed before it could begin. Wreck cracked her knuckles and began to type. It was going to be a long night and the storm outside did nothing to lighten her mood. With the crashing of thunder outside, the beating of the rain on the window, and the blaring of the civilian's radio downstairs, Agent Wreck worked continuously until she could type no more. She let out a long sign as she shut down the machines. The rest could wait until tomorrow when there was more coffee. The rain continued and made Agent Wreck's eyes feel heavier than all the paperwork she still had to shift through. A weary mind made more mistakes and the mission would not allow a single mistake. It was better to turn in than to compromise the operation. 'A comforter' thought Wreck as she shook her head and shambled to the bedroom inside mission control. A good night's sleep was what she needed. The symphony of the storm raging outside continued as she slipped into a dreamless sleep.

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02MAY2010

Secret Agents Dr. Dork and FreakFace worked hard to keep up their civilian disguise as sisters. Today they were supposed to be posing as backstage hands at the annual Davidson Academy Dance Company recital. This ruse gave them a perfect opportunity to meet up with Secret Agent Them are Some Big Ole Guns, whose daughter was a member of DADC, to secure his cooperation. Time was of the essence, and the storm that had raged continuously through the night was working against them. Routes from mission control and the safe houses were slowly being blocked by the rising river. In fact, the rise of the Cumberland had thwarted their plans as the recital was delayed by a day due to the weather. Being the intellectual one, Dr. Dork decided to meet up with Them Are Some Big Ole Guns at the church he attended with his family. No one would be any wiser as Dr. Dork and FreakFace had become members of the church to complete their disguise as proper small town residents.

Dr. Dork slipped not so quietly and not so gracefully into the pew next to Them Are Some Big Ole Guns and his family. With whispered conversation and hushed laughter shared between Them Are Some Big Ole Guns' daughter, Jesse, and Dr. Dork, it looked like good friends catching up before the service started. Dr. Dork leaned over and began whispering to Them Are Some Big Ole Guns and his wife, Dee. To everyone else in the small church nothing seemed out of order as this was a ritual that occurred almost every Sunday Dr. Dork attended. Dee slowly faded away from the small talk and began to read the church bulletin.

"Secret Agent Them Are Some Big Ole Guns have you thought about your involvement in the mission at hand?" Dr. Dork quietly asked.

"Yes, I'm in. Good idea having I've Lost My Marbles come to me to retrieve the package. It will look like neighbors visiting. No one will think twice about it," replied Them Are Some Big Ole Guns.

"Our thoughts, indeed. I will have Secret Agent Wreck deliver your mission briefing documents soon."

"Right then." Them Are Some Big Ole Guns leaned back and in a slightly louder voice asked, "So when are your dad and mom coming back?"

"Next Saturday, I bet they are glad they are missing these storms."

"Yes, I bet they are." Them Are Some Big Ole Guns shot a glance at his daughter to warn her that she was getting a little too loud. Them Are Some Big Ole Guns did not have to disguise himself as much as the other agents. Everyone knew he was a Blackhawk mechanic for the US Army. They just didn't know what other covert missions he was involved in.

The church service began as the rain continued to fall outside. By the time church let out the rivers had risen, covering roadways surrounding the quiet little haven of Springfield. Secret Agent Dr. Dork could not return to the staging area that night, nor could Secret Agent FreakFace return to her civilian life and civilian boyfriend. A 500 year flood had come to Middle Tennessee, but this would not delay the plan. The Hunt For Burr's Lost Marbles had secured another agent.

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22MAY2010

In just over two weeks, six agents had confirmed. Mission control was awaiting confirmation from the elusive Agent 8 Point. Wreck sat in mission control absent mindedly tapping her fingers on the keyboard without triggering a reaction. Many thoughts had run through her head that day. ' What if Agent I've Lost My Marbles doesn't go along with the plan? What if one of the agents falters and lets slip the true nature of the mission? I've Lost My Marbles was intelligent, but what if he over complicated things? Would he have the right protection in case of danger, we wouldn't want to send him into a gun battle with a Bowie knife.' Communication with the staging area wasn't supposed to take place until 25MAY2010 but Wreck had connected to M.E.'s secure link anyways.

Usually watching a John Wayne flick calmed the agent down, but today all it did was remind her of I've Lost My Marbles. She turned the movie Hellfighters off and switched back to the cable station where Dirty Jobs was on. Without caring she dropped the remote to the floor. Thoughts of the mission floated back to the forefront of her mind.

'Would he recognize the other agents? Was there a way for the other agents to signal their alliance with him?' Wreck sat back as she tried to push the doubts from her head.

"AGENT WRECK! AGENT WRECK! WAKE UP!" Dr. Dork was yelling through the secure link.

"I'm sorry. I think I drifted off." Agent Wreck sat up straight in her seat.

"I had a brain wave that we could use!" Agent Dr. Dork spit out quickly (which was common for her when she was excited). "I was doing a mental check of everything we have done already. We need a SIGNAL!"

"Ok, I know I may still be a little foggy brained, but please explain. A signal?"

"Yes. I was thinking that Agent I've Lost My Marbles tends to over complicate matters instead of looking at the simple things! The KISS principle just doesn't stick with him. Why don't we have the other agents play with marbles so he knows he has reached an agent in the alliance?"

"Bloody brilliant!"

"Thank goodness, I was starting to think that our mission was too simple. He might over think it."

"That's what I've been worrying about all day! I dozed off worrying about it."

"That is why we have Agent Clover tracking his progress." Agent Dr. Dork pointed out and continued, "She can encourage him to not give up."

"Yes, but knowing him he will not give up."

"No, he won't. That is why we are all systems go. Have the mission briefing documents been distributed?"

"Not yet. Agent Clover and I have a rendezvous at 1600 01JUNE2010 to pass off information."

"It's good to see that you have everything under control down there," Dr. Dork said appreciatively. "This mission cannot succeed without your brains and organization skills."

"Agent Dr. Dork, your flattery embarrasses me. But you have been the one with most of the good ideas."

"Why thank you. To proceed. Please send confirmation after the hand off."

"Will do. Agent Wreck over and out."

"Agent Dr. Dork over and out."

Wreck looked around Mission Control; her feeling of doubt had subsided. With everything done until time for next week's handoff she could relax for once. She went back to watching Dirty Jobs. Today, Mike Rowe was making marbles. Was that a good omen?

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01JUN2010 1600HRS

"Pay close attention to what I am saying. I cannot give you a set of mission briefing documents because of your close relationship with Agent I've Lost My Marbles. We cannot risk him discovering anything until the designated time." Wreck glanced around nervously. The time had come for the handoff with Agent Clover. The location for the handoff had been specifically chosen for the fact that it was a visitor's spot in town, locals did not visit here normally. Passing documents here would not seem out of the ordinary. Last year Wreck had secured a position there to make handoffs less suspicious.

"Ok, I'm set to meet up with Agent Peppermint tonight to give her mission briefing documents. I can hold on to the other mission briefing documents until I meet up with the other agents," Clover seemed to understand what her role was.

"Where are you going to secure the documents until distribution?"

"Well my house of course," Clover seemed to think that should have been understood.

"Agent Clover! Might I remind you that YOU ARE SLEEPING WITH THE ENEMY! If he found any evidence before the appointed time, the mission will be blown! Maybe you should just take Agent Peppermint's mission briefing documents, and I will keep the rest until we can meet up again."

"Yes, that would probably be better. You know how I am."

"Yes, ma'am. Keep it simple."

"Ok, well I am going to go and meet with Agent Peppermint so she can make the drop off tonight," Clover said as she started to turn to leave.

"Very good. Please confirm once the drop off is complete."

"Roger." With that the two agents said their goodbyes and Clover left. Wreck lingered with a worried look on her face. She trusted Agent Clover with her whole being. But of all the agents, she worried the most about Clover. That simple statement, 'at my house of course,' made Wreck rethink the necessity of using Clover. She had an almost sixth sense about most situations, especially when it came to I've Lost My Marbles. That fact alone could be very useful. However, the fact remained that Clover could never get more than "Almost Satisfactory" on her annual ME agent review. She had a consistent history of revealing vital mission plans before the allotted time. No agent involved in mission Pocket Watch could forget how she had let the beans slip. In this mission that could be dangerous. Could she be discreet and secretive enough until the mission was complete? Only time could tell. Only time would tell.

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Agent Peppermint,

Your mission if you choose to accept it:

Give the enclosed note and marble to your fellow agent Burr Mathews aka "Agent I've Lost My Marbles."

The note simply reads "All will be revealed in the woods."

Just give him the note and marble. If he asks any questions, please don't answer. If you feel the need to answer him anything, please just say "I think you've lost your marbles, Burr," and walk away!

We thank you for your continued cooperation and support. This message will not self destruct.

God Bless,

Agent Wreck

Agent Dr. Dork

Agent FreakFace

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02JUNE2010

A surprising number of secret agents had infiltrated the membership of Springfield Baptist Church. Some knew of each others presence. Some did not. I've Lost My Marbles was of the latter, he was blissfully unaware of the other agents true identities. When I've Lost My Marbles started singing with the choir, he had the habit of bringing peppermints to enjoy during the sermon. He would share peppermints with people around him. That is how he met Agent Peppermint, when she was still a civilian. The sparky agent known for high jinx and mischief joined M.E. several months ago. Unbeknownst to I've Lost My Marbles, the friendship had supplied her code name. For over ten years they sat next to each other in choir and for over ten years I've Lost My Marbles had shared his peppermints with her.

Tonight the choir practice room was filled with the sounds of music. But in between, Agent Peppermint discreetly handed I've Lost My Marbles a small bag containing the designated marbles and a small note. The note simply read, "All will be revealed in the woods." I've Lost My Marbles set the bag and note under his hat without even reading the note.

The practice continued, filling the quiet corridor outside. Peppermint leaned over and said, "Why Burr, I think you lost your marbles!"

"Oh no, I didn't! They're right here, see?" He said as he lifted his hat to reveal the marbles and unread note. The night continued, and Agent I've Lost My Marbles was still unaware of the mission that had just begun.

 

09JUNE2010

Agent I've Lost My Marbles had several civilian activities that he enjoyed like hunting on Thanksgiving morning and going to watch bull riding and rodeos with his daughters. But, the one he enjoyed the most was going to White Oak, otherwise known as Fish Camp.

Fish Camp is one of those places people discover after being hopelessly lost on country back roads.you. It was a beautiful wild life sanctuary by White Oak Creek, which emptied into a nearby lake. If you go there you are surrounded by a green pallet of vegetation and the symphony of chirping crickets, bird whistles, and babbling brooks. But the men who attended fish camp knew exactly where they were. This is a place they intentionally came to escape when their lives became entangled in the busy world of work, cell phones, deadlines, and conference calls.

But like many things in I've Lost My Marbles life, this too had been infiltrated by M.E.'s secret agents. They had come to escape their civilian jobs, but not the life of an agent. They still had their own missions to accomplish. I've Lost My Marbles knew something was going to happen. He could feel it in his bones. Besides, he had received that ominous letter stating "all will be revealed in the woods." What he was expecting was nothing like what was waiting for him.

I've Lost My Marbles had tired of the excitement of the creek, and wanted to try his luck at fishing on the serenity and stillness of the lake. He was in luck because Robert Fowler was heading to the lake as well. Robert was the son of one of I've Lost My Marbles' friends and had graduated with his daughter. What I've Lost My Marbles didn't know was M.E. had recently recruited Robert. After extensive training and initiation, Robert Fowler had become Agent 99. Once again I've Lost My Marbles was unaware of how vast M.E.'s reach was.

Agent 99 offered I've Lost My Marbles a ride to the lake, and he accepted. During the ride, 99 produced a small set of marbles and handed them to I've Lost My Marbles. A look of bewilderment clouded I've Lost My Marbles' face. And at that moment 99 handed him the enclosed letter:

Daddy, Several facts have come to our attention: 1. You are a difficult person to find an appropriate father's day gift for. 2. When we finally find something "perfect" for you...you will find one little clue and hunt down any available information about the gift. 3. You are getting older. 4. There is a prominent family history of Alzheimer's 5. Combining facts 3 and 4...you may be losing your marbles in your old age. Taking all of this into account, we are not giving you your father's day gifts; you will have to find them. We have hidden several things at camp to help you with your quest. You must find them before you leave otherwise the trail might go cold. With luck by father's day you will have recovered most of those marbles you've lost (especially the ones we like the most). So Bubba you've got some hunting to do; a fellow singer holds your next clue at camp. To retrieve your next clue you must say, "Secret Agent I've lost my marbles." Once you have retrieved your clue from the Special Agent you may ask them their Secret Agent name. Secret Agent Clover will be tracking your progress. In order to receive your Father's Day bonus you must complete all missions.

With every sentence he read, Agent I've Lost My Marbles' shoulders sunk lower and lower. 99 glanced over, "Everything ok, Burr? I think you lost your marbles."

"I see this is payback coming my way," I've Lost My Marbles said with fear in his voice.

"You better go along with this. You don't know what the consequences could be," Agent 99 said with a warning in his voice.

"Yes I deserved this." And with that I've Lost My Marbles sat back in his seat and continued on in silence. Agent Marbles was now aware of the mission at hand. He was now aware that he was under the control of M.E. He knew that to not cooperate once they had you could lead to consequences of epic proportions. The Hunt for Burr's Lost Marbles was officially underway.

11JUNE2010

Over the past few days I've Lost My Marbles had spent many a quiet moment pondering his mission. What was his ultimate goal? What were the consequences if he did not cooperate? Was he in imminent danger? Surely M.E. would protect him. They wouldn't send him into a hand grenade battle with water balloons, would they?

The time was at hand, he had to meet up with the next agent. But, who could it be? After going through many possible scenarios, he decided he must be expected to meet up with someone else that was in choir with him: Danny Atchley. But could it be? Danny was a nice, unassuming guy who wouldn't harm a fly. He wasn't cut out to be a secret agent. Or was he?

Oh, yes, he was. Because he was a talented man he had come to M.E.'s attention very early on. Because he shared many common interests with I've Lost My Marbles, he was a perfect choice for the mission. Danny had become known as Agent Man of Many Voices, because of his many vocal talents.

I've Lost My Marbles was just waiting for the perfect opportunity to confront Man of Many Voices. It could be embarrassing if he was wrong and confronted a civilian with the code phrase. I've Lost My Marbles noticed Man of Many Voices was now standing alone at the edge of a tent absent mindedly fiddling with something in his hands. I've Lost My Marbles took a deep breath and sauntered over to where Man of Many Voices stood.

"Um, Danny, can we talk?" I've Lost My Marbles asked hesitantly. The could be one of the most ridiculous things he had ever done.

"Well, of course, Burr. What's on your mind?"

At that moment I've Lost My Marbles noticed that the object Man of Many Voices had been toying with was a marble! "Secret Agent I've Lost My Marbles!" He spit out excitedly.

"Well, Burr, the first step to overcoming your problem is admitting you have one in the first place," Man of Many Voices reached his hand into his pocket and extracted a small bag of marbles and the ivory colored envelope I've Lost My Marbles had been expecting. "Hold on just one moment." Man of Many Voices reached down into his bag and extracted something else and carefully looked around before handing it to I've Lost My Marbles. "Be careful on the journey ahead." With that, Man of Many Voices walked away without a second glance back towards I've Lost My Marbles.

"Oh no. I must be in danger," though I've Lost My Marbles. Why else would M.E. supply him with a gun!?

All quests have a certain degree of danger. We would be remiss if we allowed you to begin your adventure without a degree of appropriate protection. So take hart and be diligent in finding your next clue. To retrieve your next clue you must say, "Secret Agent I've lost my marbles." Once you have retrieved your clue from the Special Agent you may ask them their Secret Agent name. Secret Agent Clover will be tracking your progress. In order to receive your Father's Day bonus you must complete all missions.

12JUNE2010

Agent I've Lost My Marbles knew how M.E. operated. Mission control would not arm him unless it was necessary. What danger lay ahead? What should he do next? How many of his friends were agents? M.E. had revealed much to him in the past few days. They were a greater force than he had reckoned, and this was a force not to be messed with. He needed to figure out his next clue.

"Take hart," thought I've Lost My Marbles. M.E. was known to be nerds and grammar Nazis; it was not like them to misspell something. He looked at the clue again. Hart? What if it was a last name, like his wife's best friend, Beverly Hart? Well he could try when he got home. He thought back to his clue from 99. Several things were hidden at camp. How could he be so thoughtless!? Paul Hart, Beverly's husband! He was at fish camp too! Now he had to wait until he could talk to Paul alone. He hated saying the code phrase out loud. It would be a little embarrassing if someone overheard it.

After a few hours, I've Lost My Marbles finally saw Paul Hart walking alone. He jogged up next to him and quietly said, "Secret Agent I've Lost My Marbles." Paul looked at him questioningly. I've Lost My Marbles panicked for a moment. He had gotten the clue wrong! But, then Paul pulled out a marble and motioned for I've Lost My Marbles to follow him.

Paul led I've Lost My Marbles to a nearby tent where he handed him a letter and a CD. I've Lost My Marbles took them graciously and then asked him, "What is your secret agent name."

"Banjo," he said as he began to turn around and walk away.

No one spoke much during this mission. I've Lost My Marbles was beginning to feel he was all on his own during this. The fellow agents were only pointing the way. They weren't there to help him. What did all of this mean? Would there be an end in sight soon? M.E. had him questioning the alliance of everyone around him. Was anyone on his side? How much more until he could figure out the puzzle? How much longer until M.E. let him figure out the puzzle?

We would like to ensure that the hunt for your lost marbles is not lacking in any aspect of an appropriate adventure. And what would great spy flicks be without a great soundtrack? BLFI MVCG HGVK RMEL OEVH GSVW ZWLU ZXVI GZRM IVWS VZWV WHGV KXSR OWBL FNFH GURM WSRN YBQF MVUL FIGV VMGS GDLG SLFH ZMWG VMLI ZOOD ROOY VOLH GULI VEVI To retrieve your next clue you must say, "Secret Agent I've lost my marbles." Once you have retrieved your clue from the Special Agent you may ask them their Secret Agent name. Secret Agent Clover will be tracking your progress. In order to receive your Father's Day bonus you must complete all missions.

15JUNE2010 2138HOURS

"Agent Clover could have blown it or I've Lost My Marbles could be toying with her. Will send full disclosure of Clover's misdeeds through M.E. encrypted link. Note all may not be lost due to Agent Clover's limited involvement." An urgent protected message from Dr Dork had come to Wreck's phone .

Agent Wreck's fears had been confirmed. Clover's role in the mission was to aide mission control in tracking I've Lost My Marbles progress, not assist him with the clues or reveal her knowledge of the mission. But she had done just that! Clover had failed M.E. This could be Mission Pocket Watch all over again. It is true that without her assistance I've Lost My Marbles may have not met deadline. But she had over stepped her boundaries.

Upon returning from Fish Camp, Agents I've Lost My Marbles and Clover had been in casual conversation when I've Lost My Marbles mentioned a particularly puzzling clue. Agent Clover offered a hint, "It's Morse code!" No it was not Morse code. The code I've Lost My Marbles was talking about was a simple letter replacement cipher. Agents Wreck and Dr. Dork had chosen the puzzle because it was simple, yet I've Lost My Marbles was over complicating things as he always did.

Once I've Lost My Marbles had figured out his current clue, met up with Agent Them Are Some Big Ole Guns, and received his next clue, he would discover Clover knew more than she was saying. He might try to pry information out of her. I've Lost My Marbles' interrogation techniques were good, but not great. On the other hand Clover's resistance to his techniques was weak. She would crack in no time if he pressed hard enough.

Agent I've Lost My Marbles only had to meet with four more agents (including Wreck) before his mission was complete. They were in the home stretch. Agent Wreck knew the mission was nearing completion, but nearer the mission came to completion the more stress the agent felt. All coming rendezvous had time constraints and deadlines. Plus when it was completed she would have many mission debriefing documents to process.

Agent I've Lost My Marbles was proving to be as clever as always. Could he be thwarted? Was the mission blown? Would he continue to play ally or attempt terror? Something had to be done to keep I've Lost My Marbles in his place and on the right path.

 

14JUNE2010

Agent Ive Lost My Marbles had been worried at Fish Camp that M.E. had gotten their hands on his marbles that he had since childhood. Upon returning home he had furiously searched for his marbles. He sighed with relieve when he realized he had not lost his marbles. But, he still had his clue to figure out. The code reminded him of the onetime use codes he used to have to use. But, that didn't mean that would help him now. He had to figure it out, and figure it out soon.

Finally approximately 2000HRS, He had figured out that he had to visit his neighbor, Chet. Could it be that M.E. had managed to completely surround him with agents? Were they watching him all the time? The clue said he had by 14JUNE2010 to get to his next clue or all would be lost forever. He surely didn't want to miss this. It was getting late and he was very tired from his civilian job, he must do it now.

He walked down the hill beside his estate, and down to Chet Beck's manor. Hesitantly he knocked on the back door, and luckily Chet answered quickly. "Secret Agent I've Lost My Marbles," I've Lost My Marbles stated. He was starting to get used to saying it, and wasn't as embarrassed anymore when he had to say it.

"Here you go." Agent Them Are Some Big Ole Guns said and handed I've Lost My Marbles his package, clue, and marbles.

"Thank you. Well it's late, and I'm tired. Have a great night." I've Lost My Marbles said. Luckily both men were men of few words. They didn't need to say much to express how they felt. With this quick exchange the agents went their own ways. Them Are Some Big Ole Guns closed the door and headed back into his house, and I've Lost My Marbles headed back up the hill to his estate.

Once inside he opened the note to discover:

*--/****/*/*-*/* -*--/---/**-/*-* --/**/***/***/**/---/-*/ -***/*/--*/*-/-*/ *-/ *-**/--/---/***/-/ -/*--/---/ *--/*/*/-*-/***/ *-/--*/---/ ***/---/ -*--/---/**-/ --/ **-/***/-/ *-*/*/-/**-/*-*/-*/ ***/---/ ---/-*/ -/****/*/ *----/-****/-/****/ -**/ ---/-*/*----*/-/ -**/*-*/---/*--*/ -/****/*/ --/*-/*-*/-***/*-**/*/***/ -**/---/ -*/*----*/-/ *-**/*/-/ -/****/*/--/ --*/---/ -*-/*/*-*/ *--*/*-**/**-/-*/-*-/

They were really digging back into his past. Could he remember Morse code from Boy Scouts? I've Lost My Marbles sat back and tried to see if he could remember it without looking. After a little bit, he realized he needed help. He went to the library in his estate and went to locate his old Boy Scout Manual. But to his dismay, several pages were missing! And the missing section included the Morse code. In the next book he found the assistance he needed.

Where your mission first began almost two weeks ago so you must return so on the 16th don't drop the marbles don't let them go ker plunk.

He felt better having figured out the clue. He could now open the package he had received. He reached in and felt it, and then slowly pulled it out. A picture frame. But no simple picture frame, it was his picture in it. And not just any picture of him. This picture was special. It was of him from when he served in the United States Navy on the U.S.S. Forestall. And the frame said it all.

Proud Veteran

I PROUDLY served my country

I did all that could do

to PROTECT our land, keep it FREE,

its causes GREAT and TRUE

And though I no longer serve

You will ALWAYS see in me

Someone PROUD to be a veteran,

And someone THANKFUL to be FREE.

Judith Bulock Morse

 

16JUNE2010 1830HRS

Agent I've Lost My Marbles had now been on his mission for two weeks. Now he had to return to where he began. In his mind's eye, the mission had started at Fish Camp, and there was no way he could fit another trip up there just yet. But then again, he had gotten a clue from his friend Pat Binkley. Going back to choir practice did fit the kerplunk clue better. He was hoping he was right and wouldn't miss the deadline.

He tried to push the mission out of his mind and enjoy the rest of his day at choir practice. As he was walking by the prop room, Carol (a co-choir person) commented, "Why is this door unlocked?" She locked the door and they both continued on towards the choir room. I've Lost My Marbles still had to figure out the clue.

When he walked in the door everything made sense. The minister of music, Matt Plunk, was obviously playing with a marble. He was not hiding it. It could just be a coincidence, but no it couldn't be. M.E. would make sure to control everything; that's just how they were. So, I've lost my marbles walked up to him and said, "Secret Agent I've Lost My Marbles."

"Very good, Agent Marbles, I hid the package in the campfire you made," Agent Wavy Fingers whispered.

I've Lost My Marbles turned around and began thinking about what in the world could that mean. Everything was so cryptic, but simple when he really thought about it. A campfire, that he built, that would still be around, and that was still nearby. For one of the youth projects he had built a prop campfire, it was a spectacular construction, almost lifelike! And, it would still be in the prop closet. He walked triumphantly to the prop closet, determinedly grabbed the door handle, and stopped. The door was locked. Carol locked it. Maybe the campfire was why it was unlocked. He turned again, and went back to Matt. "What's your secret agent name?"

":Secret Agent Wavy Fingers."

"Very well, Secret Agent Wavy Fingers could you please unlock the prop closet?"

"Sure." Wavy Fingers went with I've Lost My Marbles to the prop closet and unlocked it for him, and then he turned and we back to the choir room because practice was going to begin soon.

I've Lost My Marbles quickly found the campfire and along with it a letter and another package. After having received such an amazing package before, he couldn't wait to see what M.E. had supplied him with this time. Would it be something to protect him? Something to inspire him? Or, could it be something to humble him? The simple brown wrapping wouldn't deter him. He unwrapped it, spliced open the tape, and opened the box inside. It was full of stationery. A small note on the box said that it was a present from his youngest daughter, Brinkley. Now he could write her more little letters to encourage her. But now he still had the clue from M.E. What was he expected to do now? There couldn't possibly be a whole lot more steps before his mission was complete? He took the manila envelope and turned it over, slipped out the note and read:

Don't let the sun set on the work week without a rendezvous with the friend responsible for your view of the sunrise on Thanksgiving. He will be expecting you on 18JUN2010. Please call on a secured line to 615-384-0000 to arrange for the drop off. To retrieve your next clue you must say, "Secret Agent I've Lost My Marbles." Once you have retrieved your clue from Special Agent you may ask them their Secret Agent name. Secret Agent Clover will be tracking your progress. In order to receive your Father's Day bonus you must complete all missions.

18JUNE2010

Agent I've Lost My Marbles had been reflecting on the last couple of weeks. What he had learned. M.E. really did have their hand in everyone's cookie jar. As soon as he got off work, he picked up his phone and dialed. The phone rang and was answered on the 2nd ring, "Hey Gary, this is Burr. I'm on my way over to your place."

"Ok, see you in a little bit than Burr." Phone conversations were short and sweet in I've Lost My Marbles life.

I've Lost My Marbles drove out of town and turned down the road he traveled every Thanksgiving morning. On those morning he would wake up very early, travel over to Agent 8 Point's house, and eat breakfast with 8 Point, 8 Point's wife, Debbie, and several other hunters. Then they would all go into the woods and spend hours waiting for the kill shot. You couldn't help but run into wildlife at his farm. Turkeys ran circles in the driveway and deer walked without caution around the yard. The Keyt farm was away from the city, the roaring of the semi's passing by, the thumping of bad stereos driving down the street, none of that was heard. In fact all you heard was nothing. And it was perfect.

I've Lost My Marbles undid his seat belt and got out of the uniform van, and approached the house. He paused for a moment to prepare. No one was around, but still saying the code phrase was embarrassing. He wasn't admitting to anything, he was just stating his agent name (but he did not know that). He rang the doorbell, and waited. In just under a minute, Agent 8 Point answered the door. I've Lost My Marbles took another deep breath and said, "Secret Agent I've Lost My Marbles."

"It's good to know that you have come to grip with that, Burr," Agent 8 Point said as he smiled. A marble magically appeared in his hands, and he passed it to I've Lost My Marbles. "I didn't trust the security here, so I put the package where the water flows. Just pull on the string to retrieve it." The door was shut and I've Lost My Marbles was left outside, in the heat and quiet.

When they went hunting, there was a spigot across the way from the woods. Maybe that is what 8 Point was talking about. He strolled over to the area, and looked around. He didn't really see anything out of the ordinary. No string that he could see. Where else could he be talking about? This had to be it though, so he took a closer look. With his failing eye sight maybe a closer look would be helpful. I've Lost My Marbles knelt down as he swept his hand over the grass area. Out of nowhere his hand brushed across a string. "This can't be," thought I've Lost My Marbles, and he began to tug gently on the string. It was a little on the heavy side, heavier than any fish he had reeled in lately. A neon orange and green package materialized out of the landscape.

"What the?" M.E. was definitely not discreet with this package. This packaged had been sealed by weaving duct tape around the box. Where did it start? Where did it end? How in the world was he supposed to get in this? I've Lost My Marbles grabbed the package and letter, looked around for what he did not know, and headed towards his company van. He could figure this all out once he was at home.

He hurried towards the estate, and rushed into his laboratory. Taking an Exacto knife, he carefully spliced into the corner of the package. He did not want to damage the goods inside. After painstakingly slicing through the first layer of duct tape, he carefully began splitting the second layer. This package was expertly prepared, and he wanted to preserve it as best as possible. After what seemed like an eternity he was through. He carefully lifted the top to reveal a leather journal and very nice pen. The leather journal had been stamped with the family crest and leather braided on the edges. It was a masterpiece in itself. With many stories of things that had happened in his life, this would be a perfect place to write them down so he could pass them down to his daughters. M.E. had thought of everything.

He was beginning to see what M.E. had in mind. The missions weren't that bad, they were actually quite enjoyable. Did he really want this to end?

The last shall be the first and the first shall be the last. So it is with the last step in the search for your marbles. Seek out your first born before 1500HRS on 20JUN2010 for the last of your search and the end of our mission.

 

20JUNE2010

Agent Wreck had been on pins and needles for hours. Today was the day Agent I've Lost My Marbles would be picking up his final package and then the rest would be in his hands. But he would have had to understand the clue. Communication with the other agents had been limited. So if he know to show up today, only he knew.

With only a few distractions to keep her mind off of everything that could have and could still go wrong the time crawled by. Every few minutes Wreck checked her secure link to see if there was any communication from any of the agents. Finally a message was received from Agent Clover.

"I'm out to lunch with I've Lost My Marbles. Would you like us to bring you anything when we stop by?"

The Hallelujah Chorus played in Wreck's mind as she realized Clover had done her job well and assisted I've Lost My Marbles in an appropriate manner. And with that simple communication most of Wreck's doubts seemed to disappear. The rest of those doubts would fade when she saw the "company" car pull up and I've Lost My Marbles sauntered in the door. Also as soon as he walked in she would have food, which was good because she had forgotten lunch.

Forty seven minutes later, Wreck glanced a sighting of the golden minivan that never stood out except to those who knew it. With the sound of the glass door sliding open came the consistent and measured step of boots hitting the tiled floor. Then came the familiar sight of the agent in his Sunday best, western style suit complete with bolo tie.

"Secret Agent I've lost my marbles," he said as if he had said it one too many times. "What did I do to deserve this?"

"Well Secret Agent I've Lost My Marbles the fact is we had to." Wreck said as she gave him the final package. "With any prior mission where we were working against you, you always seemed to foil our hard laid plans. We figured by including you there was less chance of that happening. And with such an important mission we couldn't let you out do us." Agent Wreck and I've Lost My Marbles sat down in chairs facing each other. "The rest of this mission is all up to you. You have now been given all the tools necessary to complete the mission. And, the mission is this: write down your stories and adventures. Write the details down before they fade or worse before you fade." Wreck tried hard to bite back the tear that were fighting to form. "Your legacy and knowledge are too vast and great not to share at least within M.E. Please grant us this one wish, write it all down. We hope to never forget what Douglas Burr Mathews has done for the world, his country, and for his family. Write it down."

With that Wreck got up and returned to her civilian job as a desk clerk. I've Lost My Marbles sat for a moment and then he too rose and he left. Will this mission ever be completed? Will he write it all down? Only Agent I've Lost My Marbles can answer that.

 

Author's Note I have attempted to write this as true to events as possible. Although some events had to be fudged as their details are still unknown to me since I wasn't there. I have tailored language and situations to befit a spy story. But this is my recounting of my father's adventure to retrieve his Father's Day presents. My sisters and I could have never pulled this off without a lot of help! We would like to thank all of the agents in no particular order: Pat Binkley, Robert Fowler, Danny Atchley, Paul Hart, Chet Beck, Matt Plunk, and Gary Keyt. Also thank you to Fox and James for helping me with technical know how and advise on the writing. I have thoroughly enjoyed writing this and I hope you enjoyed reading about how we tortured our dad in 2010. In all seriousness, we wanted to honor our father. He is the unique, caring, knowledgeable, creative, and wonderful man around!

Douglas Burr Mathews was born on January 16, 1947. He proudly served our Country upon the USS Forrestal. He married Elaine Adell Brinkley on July 22, 1978. He has three children: Rebekah, Rachel, and Brinkley. He currently resides in Springfield, TN.